Sawadeeka friend! 👋

Greetings from Koh Phangan, Thailand 🇹🇭

I didn’t even know this island existed until a few weeks ago when I went on Instagram for the first time in a while and saw a high school friend’s post shared beautiful pictures here. A few taps later: an 8-hour van, ferry, and motorbike ride brought me here. Now I wake to waves outside my bungalow, reminding me of why I love sailing—it's the sound of movement, of life, of energy. I miss sailing.

Quick aside: Look at this cool thingy I designed on my Supernote e-journal at a cafe yesterday while writing up this edition by hand first :)

To backtrack: April began with a sweaty, sleepless night in a fan-only room in Chiang Mai after a three hour drive moving from Chiang Rai. What followed was a month of full-body, full-heart motion—from massage school and muddy river water gun fights to sunset journaling and eating Thai food with my parents for their first time in Asia.

Some film shots from Chiang Rai, my home of 5 month. In my schoohouse, I had three roommates—two Thai and one from Maryland (pictured) and Blue the water cat I cuddled with every night <3

Scroll on for stories, photos, and reflections from letter 260 from a learn-it-all 💌

As a headsup this post is too long for email so read it online for the whole experience.

~~~

🙌 Wins

Became a certified Thai massage therapist after 60 hours of training with Kru Tiwa and the Sunshine School.

Updated my life resumé to be more playful and personal.
Watched the sunset every night of my 18 days in Chiang Mai, journaling as a ritual.
Downsized from two giant suitcases to two backpacks, lightening my load for wherever life flows next.
Painted and gifted watercolor cards to 15+ people—friends, mentors, and my parents.
Started recording a podcast on a whim with interviews with my parents as the first episodes.
Reached out to one person per day—emails, DMs, voice notes. Connection as practice.
Faced me fear of needles and got acupuncture for the first time from a Traditional Chinese doctor

🌀 Surprises & Lessons

I adore being in school and collaborating with others to learn together, especially something as hands-on with fast feedback loops like Thai Massage.
In massage, progress isn’t linear and that’s okay. Presence > performance.
Air pollution can be a major damper on my day. I hibernated most of my time in Chiang Mai when I wasn’t in massage school except for when it started raining at the end for the Songkran festival
I can use my body weight, not force, to help others heal through Thai massage and my sweaty squid hands.
Elephants sleep five hours a night and they each have a caretaker called a “mahout”
It’s not ethical to swim with elephants because they want to roll around and take up space but with people around they are inhibited.
There is an island on built on stilts above the Sea call Panyee in south Island with a restaurant that serves tasty Hilal food. There are 3000 Muslims that live on this island with a gold-spired Mosque to practice at. There is a school, floating football field and tennis court.
Walking through the “Ice cream cave” in the dark, I would’ve probably had a panic attack if I was in there longer than the 10 minutes. I hate dark enclosed spaces like caves, elevators, bathrooms, etc.
Thai monks can be married with a wife and family as long as during the practice of their practicum they are not in contact with them.
I learned that expressing what’s been festering, without needing a solution, can be a form of freedom. Voicing my truth without needing everyone to agree with it. It’s hard and vulnerable but healing.
James Bond’s 1974 "The Man with the Golden Gun" movie shot in Thailand changed the islands forever—tourism shifted the entire economy soon after putting south Thailand on the tourism map (for better or worse?).

A traditional Chinese doctor diagnosed me with liver overheating after I stuck out my tongue, which oddly explains a lot (like not retaining water).
My life resumé might be a kooky experiment, but it’s real and mine. Maybe yours is too?

✨ Memorable Moments

Eating bland soup with Gemma and Jeremy at lunch and exchanging little jokes about their English accents
When Khru Tiwa told me I was the most improved in massage class. And in her cute Thai accent “You beautiful. You make beautiful poses.”
Enjoying a hummus feast with my Massage cohort
my mom’s excitement when she saw the elephant for the first time while we were getting sunset massages. When dad speed walked up to the same elephant the night prior.
Ordering my iced green tea with a little sugar in Thai
Buying boba milk tea after massage school and walking along the polluted, humid roads to get some steps in.
When the post office told me the price just raised to mail my post cards from 46 baht to 70 baht.
Getting lost going to a Chiang Mai tea house that I ended up at after I enjoyed a delicious lunch. On a different occasion on Koh Phangan I tried going to a Treehouse Tea House (run by Russians) but they didn’t open for another hour so I hiked up the stream and found a private waterfall and watering hole all to myself :)
hearing a man on the phone and being able to eavesdrop on some of his Dutch conversation
Introducing my Dutch friend Eline to my Thai friend Puna and hiking together with them. They planned to meet up again after I leave!
Walking drenched on the beach in the rain. Half fresh, half salty water. Laughing with dad reminiscing on when I played in puddles naked on the driveway as a babe.
Getting my foot massaged on easter afternoon with my mom
Nappies with pappy
Songkran magic—kicked off by a grinning grandma who dumped a full bucket of water over my head.
Thai temple ceremony with Mom and Dad: lighting incense, releasing fish, and making lotus flower offerings.

🎨 Creative Expressions

watercolor artist dates
Wrote and recorded my first song for students after even landing on some chords to strum along on the uke. (right before I gave away my uke)
Four letters shared online:

💭 Noggin Noodlings

Where do I want to live in June?
What does being American even mean to me now?
How can I balance freedom and sharing, solitude and belonging?
How can I be both independent and open to love?
Do I want to work online, in person, or off-grid? How do I want to bring value and be useful in this world?
What would it look like to be "Dirtbag Rich" (shoutout Blake Boles podcast)?
Is it time to get more Thai massage training—or something else entirely?
Could I write my own version of an Eat, Pray, Love novel?

🌱 Habits and Practices I Loved

Gifting thoughtful watercolor messages to old friends, new friends, and teachers
Sent thoughtful notes, emails, or WhatsApps to people I hadn’t connected with in ages.
Letting my body lead. Wandering the streets of Chiang Mai Old Town at night, discovering new places and finding my way. Less screen, more scene.

Daily meditation (with my legs up the wall like a sleepy bat) to Deepak Chopra’s

🤪 Silly Stuff

Dumped water on strangers for the Thai new year
Got mud smeared on my face by giggling teens
Cut my own hair for the first time (and didn’t cry)
Failed at hosting a journaling meetup when no one else showed up after spamming a large “Journaling group”